In melancholy, where I drown,
I must reach the shore while I’m watched with a frown.
With a soul deprived of warmth and light,
Living in a world where I must perform.
High on the past, suffocating in the present,
Dreading the future, where I must not descend.
In a fight with time that’s slipping away,
Every hour I wreck myself to escape the greatest harm.
Yet I must not stop while carrying this weight,
As I dreamt of being someone, for whom I fight fate.
......
Winter rolls in just in time to freeze my heart
Close my eyes and take me back to the start
Before the storm rolls in and black magic clouds my brain
Can’t help but wonder how long I can sustain
A corrupted heart, thoughts darker than the abyss walked
The remedy flowing through my veins, as I lose my ability to talk
Strolling through the valley of the shadow of death
Looking around and notice I’m the last one left
......
Strolling in the evergreen park so slow
Head sinking to the speckled concrete
The cracks mirroring a broken sentiment
Press play and a sweet song blares
Then the black veil lifts ever so slightly
The feeling unsustainable yet welcomed
Vibrations echoing deep through each fiber of being
Melancholy holds no sway in this domain
The beat builds as runners pass by in cardiac bliss
......
A secret whispered in the dark
Eardrums ringing like a bell in the unwatched tower
The unrevealed crash lands with the grace of a ballistic missile
Blackness embodied deep within the tenuous roots
Spreading, creeping through every last sinew
Drowning in the bile, joy lost and never found
The rapture no longer holds sway
An abyss never ending, sinking deeper to oblivion
Falling with no gravity, suspended in tortuous creation
......
When the feeling is gone and the days are too long
When you’re crying for fear, of deciding wrong
When sky always grey and the suns far too bright
When you can never sleep
When you’re out every night
When you’re too nauseous to eat & too nauseous to sleep
And the evil thoughts
Begin to creep
......
In melancholy, where I drown,
I must reach the shore while I’m watched with a frown.
With a soul deprived of warmth and light,
Living in a world where I must perform.
High on the past, suffocating in the present,
Dreading the future, where I must not descend.
In a fight with time that’s slipping away,
Every hour I wreck myself to escape the greatest harm.
Yet I must not stop while carrying this weight,
As I dreamt of being someone, for whom I fight fate.
......
Er is een stilte
die niet vraagt om gebroken te worden,
maar om gehoord te worden.
Een lege stoel aan tafel
kent meer verhalen
dan de mensen die er ooit zaten.
Het licht valt schuin
zoals herinneringen dat doen-
......
Held in your embrace,
I vanish like morning mist,
warmth I cannot keep.
Love,a slow evaporate
whispered through your steady breath.
My eyes whirl as I try to wrap my head around it
My brains scramble as they attempt to understand it
Nothing makes sense anymore, it’s no use to try
All I can do now is stand here and cry
Everyone’s left me and left no reason why
Confusion envelops me as the end runs nigh
I’m left here in sorrow, in isolation so cold
Apology does nothing, so it is here I fold.
I. Yearning for Control
If I could train emotions like muscle,
fold joy neat, then hide it away-
I'd unwrap it when the world goes cold,
......