heaven sent, arrhythmia rests
silence from my aching chest
though there's no tombstone where I sleep
all I need is what I reap
the earth beneath my fingernails
bleeds into the soil of verdant hills.
my skin a canvas, often wasted
on trifles better left to rot
now blooms violet among the wakeless
......
Somewhere
Alone
Somewhere
At home
Knock knock
Anyone there
Knock knock
Stop it
Knock knock
S i l e n c e
......
A paper cliff, and a crashing wave,
stick figures walking across the page,
nighttime curls,
and the darkness furls,
and in the starlight's shadows,
there grows to be a gallows.
Towards the ledge,
come back from the edge.
Figures turns around,
......
I’ve got so many voices inside my head,
my Schizophrenia’s keeping them fed,
I’m starting to feel lost within myself,
think I’m turning into someone else.
I’m always planning my escape,
before my brain can escalate.
“I can’t find it,
......
A secret whispered in the dark
Eardrums ringing like a bell in the unwatched tower
The unrevealed crash lands with the grace of a ballistic missile
Blackness embodied deep within the tenuous roots
Spreading, creeping through every last sinew
Drowning in the bile, joy lost and never found
The rapture no longer holds sway
An abyss never ending, sinking deeper to oblivion
Falling with no gravity, suspended in tortuous creation
......
heaven sent, arrhythmia rests
silence from my aching chest
though there's no tombstone where I sleep
all I need is what I reap
the earth beneath my fingernails
bleeds into the soil of verdant hills.
my skin a canvas, often wasted
on trifles better left to rot
now blooms violet among the wakeless
......
Sometimes I wonder if I’m the only one who sees the world like this.
Sometimes I wonder if I’m maybe cursed, that would be a good reason to be honest.
It would be a good reason to why I’m never happy.
It would be a good reason to explain the self harm and wishing to not be born.
It would be a very fucking good reason to why I can’t love people around me. I do like to be around them for a certain while, but mentally I’m never with them.
From a young age my brain learned that happiness is temporary. I’ll prefer no happiness over temporary happiness, and I hate myself for that.
......
there's a spider in the corner of your room
the spider is always there
the spider has always been there
you can't crush the spider
you can't leave the room
you know that if the spider bites you then everything you know will be gone
but you have no idea when it's going to
everyone else is trapped in a room with a spider too but they don't seem to notice
you feel like you're going crazy
......
asdfjk
Continue reading
I can hear the cars passing down below
The lights light up the street
I can feel the wind blowing on my face
I doubt anyone is looking for me
I am drowning in my own fear
I just want to be free
I am stuck in my body, waiting to be free
There are kids skipping on the pavement below
I’m so scared, I’m overflowed in my own fear
I can see every person, every dog, every cat walking on the street
......