I’ve got so many voices inside my head,
my Schizophrenia’s keeping them fed,
I’m starting to feel lost within myself,
think I’m turning into someone else.
I’m always planning my escape,
before my brain can escalate.
“I can’t find it,
......
At the end there were straws
in her glove compartment, I'd split them open
to taste the familiar bitter residue, near the end
I ate all her Percodans, hungry to know
how far they could take me.
A bottle of red wine each night moved her along
as she wrote, I feel too much, again and again.
You asked how and I said, Suicide, and you asked
how and I said, An overdose, and then
......
As I slowly strangle,
feet still on the floor.
Noose to tight to scream,
but not to ignore.
Not destine to stay,
or to live in this place.
I'm not in hurry.
life is not a footrace.
......
You ask me to be gay and glad
While lurid clouds of danger loom,
And vain and bad and gambling mad,
Australia races to her doom.
You bid me sing the light and fair,
The dance, the glance on pleasure's wings –
While you have wives who will not bear,
And beer to drown the fear of things.
A war with reason you would wage
......
I dreamt your suicide note
was scrawled in pencil on a brown paperbag,
& in the bag were six baby mice. The bag
opened into darkness,
smoldering
from the top down. The mice,
huddled at the bottom, scurried the bag
across a shorn field. I stood over it
& as the burning reached each carbon letter
of what you'd written
......
An ekphrastic poem based of off the painting ¨Death of Sappho¨ By Miguel Carbonell
¨Don't do it!¨
I say to the woman standing over the rocky cliff.
¨He's not worth it!¨
Her body draped with a white, silky dress
She looks like an angel.
¨I Loved him¨
she says leaning over the cliff.
Her eyes gaze at the violent waves, her face is pale
......
The truth
it hurts
thats why its so hard to say
But will you walk away
shrivel up when i tell you the words i’ve been so longing to say
to you
Cuz you’re all I had
I gave you my everything and you didn’t give it back
Can you stay
Please
......
As I stand before the gates of death,
And take my final, trembling breath
I'm filled with fear and deep regret
For all the things I left unsaid
I try to find my way to faith,
But no matter how I pray,
I remain an atheist at heart
A heathen creature with no god,
And now, as death draws near,
I am afraid.
......
Oh, hello itch,
I've not missed you!
Nor your pleading, uneasy,
eager smile,
wicked begging eyes,
and hungry open mouth.
I've quite enjoyed this past while,
lacking your insistent whispers.
Your lustful face
looming 'round each corner of my boxed-up,
......
Oh brokenhearted one,
Has your soul grown weary?
Oh brokenhearted one,
Had the world grown cold?
Have you come the sea to engulf your lonely tears?
Have you come to the sea, to let the cold rest come?
Here, we will pull you deeper,
Deeper into the darkness
......