Oh yes, friend! I'm crazy-
that's just the way I am.
I see sounds,
I hear sights,
I taste smells,
I touch not heaven but things from the underworld,
things people do not believe exist,
Sweetest love, I do not go,
For weariness of thee,
Nor in hope the world can show
A fitter love for me;
But since that I
Must die at last, 'tis best
To use myself in jest
Thus by feign'd deaths to die.
Yesternight the sun went hence,
The pale, the cold, and the moony smile
Which the meteor beam of a starless night
Sheds on a lonely and sea-girt isle,
Ere the dawning of morn's undoubted light,
Is the flame of life so fickle and wan
That flits round our steps till their strength is gone.
O man! hold thee on in courage of soul
Through the stormy shades of thy wordly way,
And the billows of clouds that around thee roll
I do not ask for youth, nor for delay
in the rising of time's irreversible river
that takes the jewelled arc of the waterfall
in which I glimpse, minute by glinting minute,
all that I have and all I am always losing
as sunlight lights each drop fast, fast falling.
I do not dream that you, young again,
might come to me darkly in love's green darkness
where the dust of the bracken spices the air
I dream of you walking at night along the streams
of the country of my birth, warm blooms and the nightsongs
of birds opening around you as you walk.
You are holding in your body the dark seed of my sleep.
This comes after silence. Was it something I said
What is strength?
Is it hiding everything inside you strong?
Is crying all alone when no one can see strong?
Is feeling the deep pain in your chest alone strong?
Feel numb, that powers great things in you, you know it does
Realize all your life you have felt things only when allowed
'You aren't allowed now'
'Who hurt you?'
and i told myself to breathe
because you told me to breathe
and i said to myself i am worth it
because you taught me so
i looked at your beautiful boy in the mirror
and my love for me grew nearer
Blown about as leaves from some forgotten plant;
Lives lived between gusts.
Cast as seeds beneath shadows of finely-tended orchids
From whose chiffon petals dewdrops slip.
At times such seeds burst into stunning, sturdy green things;
Tendrils winding, tender offshoots issuing forth thorns of portent;
Where spires of amsonia, petunia, and strelitzia there burgeoned,
It yielded a final bouquet.
For Shylah G. Anderson and Fred Bax
slow dancing in a room, my soul is
dancing in the champagne light
that shines through the windows
the soft warmth soothes my red skin
soothes my blue soul
the movement of my white dress
stirs the air and the dust of my memories, the
hazy, beautiful details of my life
it's been a long time coming
i finally found myself and
i think thats worth rejoicing
i may have a hard life ahead of me
i may not know how my story will end
but right now i have the cool morning mist
right now i have the warm sun on my skin
right now i have hot meals and hot showers
right now i have everything i need