No one asked
why I laughed too hard at 9 a.m.,
why my hands shook
when the room was too quiet,
why my bag clanked,
why I kept a hoodie on
even in the heat.
I was thirteen,
and life felt too big to touch,
......
You sit where I swore I’d never see you again—
bottle half-drained,
still sweating in the dark,
like you never left.
You wear my fingerprints
like trophies.
You know what I’ll do
before I do it.
......
I was eleven
when the burn started to feel like home—
not the fire,
but the numb that followed.
The breathtaking silence
of my brain slowly
shutting down.
It wasn’t rebellion,
not really.
......
We passed pens like rumors
in the bathroom,
smoke curling
into secrets we never wanted to keep.
It wasn’t rebellion,
more like trying to make the day
a little softer around the edges,
like padding a fall
we already knew was coming.
......
I was eleven
when I learned the burn of vodka
could quiet the voice in my head,
the one that kept asking
why am I still here?
I drank from a water bottle filled with Bicardi
in the back of 8th grade history,
and the teacher’s words became
white noise I floated in.
......
His story had started
But he wanted to end it
His story had started
With all the feelings he blended
Right foot then left foot
He began to wobble
Right foot only
He began to hobble
He reached out for help
but he couldn't find it
......
Fallen leaves
A lack of green
My brush strokes on the canvas
I paint the sands in all it's Tanness
Cactus thorns and rows of corn
Snow and rain
Confusing pain
Light with no sun and Laughter with no fun
I'm not understanding
Trees in the sand
......
There's a horrifying creak that grows more brittle in unwelcome and unkind time.
It's ripping apart at each ablated site and teases my mind with the end of my time.
Muffled through my chest are groans, exhausted, weak, and flooding with pain.
No one does realize, and I won't tell a soul, that one ghost pump could mark my final day.
It's a blessing to wake up and think, because it means you still know you're alive.
So take advantage of all the ways to twist your brain and exercise your mind's inclines.
It's a blessing to see, taste, touch, and smell; so, experience the earth while you still can.
......
I was eleven
when I learned the burn of vodka
could quiet the voice in my head,
the one that kept asking
why am I still here?
I drank from a water bottle filled with Bicardi
in the back of 8th grade history,
and the teacher’s words became
white noise I floated in.
......
We passed pens like rumors
in the bathroom,
smoke curling
into secrets we never wanted to keep.
It wasn’t rebellion,
more like trying to make the day
a little softer around the edges,
like padding a fall
we already knew was coming.
......