I feel stuck, trapped,
in the vast space entitled of freedom.
And I am free- no chains to hold me down,
no strings for me to hang on,
yet the suffocation I am surrounded by,
has me lost in a world of void,
dropping down the rabbit-hole,
hands stretched out to hold onto something,
something- anything,
as the fear creeps and crawls up my spine,
......
The little girl that sits on top of the sand hill
Waiting for the sailboat
Funny because she knows nothing about a sail boat
With no shoes and knots in her hair
She blames herself for the sailboat not coming
So she overcompensates this part of her life with bad jokes
But she knows that the sailboat will eventually be there
......
I've been crying on my knees, hoping you would rescue me.
Oh, darling don't you remember me?
The one you said you'd always need.
Now I'm collecting dust in the closet of people you loved.
And silenced and sad thinking of the love we never had.
Oh, won't you open your eyes and see.
Won't you please remember me.
All my hopes and all my dreams all seem like they won't be coming true. Yet all I can think of is you. So, I sit in this closet hoping this is a dream. And waiting...and waiting, for you to remember me.
It’s not even about missing you.
It’s about having to remember
how fast and sudden you switched up,
and how horrible it made me feel.
One day you flipped,
you were sad and miserable,
you didn’t even want to be around me.
I don’t know what I did because you never told me.
You left me so confused and alone
......
I wanna make you smile and laugh,
I wanna dance with you.
I wanna hold your hand at day,
at night I wanna too.
I wanna be the first you kiss,
I wanna be your love.
As much I wanna be your last:
I wanna be enough.
......
I feel stuck, trapped,
in the vast space entitled of freedom.
And I am free- no chains to hold me down,
no strings for me to hang on,
yet the suffocation I am surrounded by,
has me lost in a world of void,
dropping down the rabbit-hole,
hands stretched out to hold onto something,
something- anything,
as the fear creeps and crawls up my spine,
......
I caught myself missing him.
Realistically I don't know if I missed him or missed the routine,
The good morning text, getting through the day updating one another and the simplicity of having someone be present in your life.
I'm not sure if I missed him or if I missed the potential I saw in him, the way his mother convinced me he was a good guy when no one was around.
I'm not sure if I missed him or missed what could have been. We could have been something good and healthy. We could have healed one another's traumas. We could have been happy.
......
if all the universe is entangled
if we are all opposites in order to exist
intertwined
we are tied, we are
victims of fate, bound
by the very nature of the impossible
but measuring renders particles split apart
cut that crimson thread that binds us
for we know our truth
the probability
......
“Only kiss me on my forehead,
if you're trying to make me yours."
A gentle sterness in your voice.
A soft command that echoes.
Is it a dare or a boundary?
I still can't decide.
And now here you are, wrappen in nights emrace.
As I see myself leaning in.
......
Oh god, turn me into a flower.
So I can find my home in the rain.
No longer lying awake,
wondering if I've soaked in the sun enough that day.
Turn me into a flower.
A yellow one, quitly bright.
So I can be picked,
without pretending to be anything more.
......