Humor Poems

Popular Humor Poems
Now you ask who can I be? A riddle
by Dr. Robert Ippaso

Some say I'm soulful,
Others the Devils tool,
One minute I might find you doleful,
The other acting quite the fool.

Yet that's patently unfair,
One aspect that I can't abide,
For I'm as pure as the morning air,
A child of the gentle ocean tide.


......

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The Stooge and the Vixen in Trumps own words
by Dr. Robert Ippaso

Bragg's just an ass, a poor leftist stooge
Bought for in full by the Soros machine,
Why target me when he knows he will loose
His obvious intentions malicious and mean.

As to that Stormy, a vixen indeed,
She's now named me ‘Tiny’ can't clearly be true,
Her one claim to fame fueled by greed
The day I first met her is the day I now rue.


......

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The Birds and the Bees Revisited
by Richard Randolph

Your mother thinks it’s time
I taught you about the birds and the bees,
so here’s what I’ll say about that.
God knows it’s easy to envy birds,
seeing them flying so high and free.
But the truth is most of them live in constant fear
of being killed and eaten by bigger birds,
or cats, or some other creature.
And all that singing the Romantics talk about,
well, it’s really just them squawking in turf wars,

......

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Double Limericks and Double Dactyls
by Michael R. Burch

This page contains double limericks, a rare triple limerick, and a new version of the double dactyl that I invented, called the "dabble dactyl."



The Platypus: a Double Limerick
by Michael R. Burch

The platypus, myopic,
is ungainly, not erotic.
His feet for bed

......

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God Is Cracking Down
by Randy Johnson

I broke one of God's Commandments when I stole an extension cord.
I was struck by a bolt of lightning because I angered The Lord.
God is cracking down on those who break his Ten Commandments.
You'd better listen to what I'm saying because I'm making a lot of sense.
When I chose to be a used car salesman, it wasn't a decision that was wise.
God struck me with leprosy because it's my job to constantly tell lies.
I haven't broken just a few of God's Commandments, I've broken all ten.
God is cracking down, he is making me pay for each and every sin.
Because I've become a leper, I can't get a date with a woman on any night.
When women see me, they wet themselves and start running because of fright.

......

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Recent Humor Poems
Now you ask who can I be? A riddle
by Dr. Robert Ippaso

Some say I'm soulful,
Others the Devils tool,
One minute I might find you doleful,
The other acting quite the fool.

Yet that's patently unfair,
One aspect that I can't abide,
For I'm as pure as the morning air,
A child of the gentle ocean tide.


......

Continue reading
What am I?
by Dr. Robert Ippaso

What am I?

I’m great fun and sometimes crazy,
Loud or soft with moods quite hazy,
Full of love, sorrow, unrequited loss,
One minute happy another sullen, cross.
I see the world in shades of neon gray,
Rarely do I care or anyone obey,
My vibes are epic, they constantly perplex,
Full of contradictions, invariably complex.

......

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McGonagall's Write (a poem in the style of William McGonagall)
by Merv Graham

Oh, gather 'round and lend an ear,
For I've a tale to tell, I fear,
Of blunders bold and mishaps grand,
In verse, I'll weave them with my hand.

Once in a village, quaint and small,
There lived a lad, not small but tall,
With knobbly knees and a crooked grin,
He often found himself in a spin.


......

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I've got Joe in hand - in Terry Fators voice
by Dr. Robert Ippaso

I have a plan
Yes it may be unconventional,
But as a fan
I assure you its success will be intentional.

Most of you may know me
My talent feted shore to shore,
With puppets real as all can see
Talking, singing and much more.


......

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Double Limericks and Double Dactyls
by Michael R. Burch

This page contains double limericks, a rare triple limerick, and a new version of the double dactyl that I invented, called the "dabble dactyl."



The Platypus: a Double Limerick
by Michael R. Burch

The platypus, myopic,
is ungainly, not erotic.
His feet for bed

......

Continue reading
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