Humor Poems

Popular Humor Poems
Watch me in action until he departs - in Trump's words
by Dr. Robert Ippaso

The more I think the more I'm sure
The odds were stacked as all can see,
The Media's rotten to the core
At least on that we should agree.

But two years on what do you think,
Did sleepy Joe succeed or fail,
I hear so many took to drink
Watching the saga of Dither and Flail.


......

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Nobody Will Pay The Kidnapper
by Randy Johnson

A man has kidnapped two people and is demanding 50 million for their safe return.
But people have discovered who the two hostages are and they are not concerned.
Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump are the two people who have been kidnapped.
People won't give a plug nickel for the safe return of those two pieces of crap.
Clinton and Trump won't be coming home any time soon, they are trapped.
If somebody does pay the ransom, he or she will certainly deserve to be slapped.

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Watching them cringe - in Trump's own words
by Dr. Robert Ippaso

Assailed, maligned, hounded and betrayed
And all for why, simply for the game I played,
My aim to win but of course the lefties don't agree,
Their views alone are all they ever want to see.

Control and power their only final goal,
That's why I say it was they that really stole
All those elections across our glorious land,
They and the Media, such a sordid little band.


......

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I'm In Jail Because of My Wife's Breasts
by Randy Johnson

Even though my wife is somebody who I love and adore.
She decided not to let me touch or see her boobs anymore.
Every time I wanted to see or caress them, she said no and I would cry.
She wouldn't let me anywhere near them and she told me the reason why.
She said that I couldn't see or touch them because I'm poor.
She said that I could see and touch them if I got rich but not before.
But I've always been so poor that I'm destitute.
Last month, I decided to rob a bank to get the loot.
I was caught by the cops after they shot me in the dick.
I knew that I would go to jail, I knew that I was licked.

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Morning
by Frank O'Hara

I've got to tell you
how I love you always
I think of it on grey
mornings with death

in my mouth the tea
is never hot enough
then and the cigarette
dry the maroon robe


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Recent Humor Poems
Watching them cringe - in Trump's own words
by Dr. Robert Ippaso

Assailed, maligned, hounded and betrayed
And all for why, simply for the game I played,
My aim to win but of course the lefties don't agree,
Their views alone are all they ever want to see.

Control and power their only final goal,
That's why I say it was they that really stole
All those elections across our glorious land,
They and the Media, such a sordid little band.


......

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dsf
by Adam Bowman

sdfsdf

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Is my charmed life dead - in Trump's own words
by Dr. Robert Ippaso

Why would I do this
What was in my head
My charmed life of bliss
Perhaps irreparably dead?

Yes I'm a fighter
A grifter of old,
I deserve a fate brighter
But on this I've been rolled.


......

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What did I do - in Putin’s own words
by Dr. Robert Ippaso

What did I do,
Quite the disaster, but if only they knew
The depth of the hole I find myself in,
Thank goodness ambition is no mortal sin.

I seriously thought this thing would be fast,
A simple invasion, a side show, a blast,
Over by dinner then pop the Champagne,
Ukraine by name only, Russia’s domain.


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Now it’s my boxes? In Trumps own words
by Dr. Robert Ippaso

Can you believe it, indicted again,
By a bunch of pure zealots, callous grey men,
Political hacks given the task,
To take down the Don and in the limelight then bask.
Find any cause, invent a good ruse,
Just make it stick, all tricks good to use.

But boxes of stuff, how low can they get,
Papers with socks stacked in the shower, some wet,
All safely collected in my place at the beach,

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