Humor Poems

Popular Humor Poems
Strange Goings On
by Evelyn Judy Buehler

I lived on a rolling green farm, and I had a love of astronomy;
And peered at skies of sleepless nighttime, so vast and starry.

It had for long been my hobby, and I had a powerful telescope,
As gold days look to onyx darkness, while they go up in smoke.

Besides being extremely edifying, stargazing was plenty of fun,
As the fun nouveau coral dawns, emerging in unique versions.

I enjoyed quiet life on the farm, as much as I loved my hobby,

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Shakespeare's Ghost - A Parody
by Friedrich Schiller

I, too, at length discerned great Hercules' energy mighty,--
Saw his shade. He himself was not, alas, to be seen.
Round him were heard, like the screaming of birds,
the screams of tragedians,
And, with the baying of dogs, barked dramaturgists around.
There stood the giant in all his terrors; his bow was extended,
And the bolt, fixed on the string, steadily aimed at the heart.
"What still hardier action, unhappy one, dost thou now venture,
Thus to descend to the grave of the departed souls here?"--
"'Tis to see Tiresias I come, to ask of the prophet

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God Is Cracking Down
by Randy Johnson

I broke one of God's Commandments when I stole an extension cord.
I was struck by a bolt of lightning because I angered The Lord.
God is cracking down on those who break his Ten Commandments.
You'd better listen to what I'm saying because I'm making a lot of sense.
When I chose to be a used car salesman, it wasn't a decision that was wise.
God struck me with leprosy because it's my job to constantly tell lies.
I haven't broken just a few of God's Commandments, I've broken all ten.
God is cracking down, he is making me pay for each and every sin.
Because I've become a leper, I can't get a date with a woman on any night.
When women see me, they wet themselves and start running because of fright.

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Nobody Will Pay The Kidnapper
by Randy Johnson

A man has kidnapped two people and is demanding 50 million for their safe return.
But people have discovered who the two hostages are and they are not concerned.
Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump are the two people who have been kidnapped.
People won't give a plug nickel for the safe return of those two pieces of crap.
Clinton and Trump won't be coming home any time soon, they are trapped.
If somebody does pay the ransom, he or she will certainly deserve to be slapped.

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Life
by Janyth Marie Banfield

Life' it's not easy, it comes with its bumps and its grinds.
Picking us up at times in our lives then kickin us straight from behind.
But one thing I've noticed as time goes by the humor that you behold
God has bestowed a magnificent gift that never makes people grow old.

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Recent Humor Poems
Is this all there is?
by Robert Ippaso

Too old by half.
Just ask the media, ask their staff,
Obstinate may be
But surely that writing on the wall can they still see?

Politics not a game for laggards,
Granted some confuse that term with braggards;
Lithe and vibrant does one need be
When all the time their message is “look at me”.


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Strange Goings On
by Evelyn Judy Buehler

I lived on a rolling green farm, and I had a love of astronomy;
And peered at skies of sleepless nighttime, so vast and starry.

It had for long been my hobby, and I had a powerful telescope,
As gold days look to onyx darkness, while they go up in smoke.

Besides being extremely edifying, stargazing was plenty of fun,
As the fun nouveau coral dawns, emerging in unique versions.

I enjoyed quiet life on the farm, as much as I loved my hobby,

......

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It's a Cat's life
by Robert Ippaso

Cozy, snuggly, curled up tight
People think I'm sleeping, but that is far from being right,
With one eye open, the other tightly shut
I plough the very trade refined by every cat.
Quiet adoration amongst the whispered sighs
For this wonderful creation, nature's wily prize.
And all the while I'm lounging, perched upon my throne
Surveying my domain from this place I call home.
I'm fed and duly watered, patted when I wish,
My life a constant slumber, something I call Bliss,

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Social Media here I come - in Trump's own words
by Robert Ippaso

I won't be muzzled or silenced
My words will be heard,
The fake Media's so biased
Their coverage absurd.

They spew venom against me
My followers trashed every day,
Yet on this they all seem to agree
Without Trump the bills they can't pay.


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Obama’s my weapon. In Biden’s own words
by Robert Ippaso

Folks say I'm struggling
That I'm old and confused,
They don't see all the haggling
Which leaves them bemused.

My colleagues are wordy
My enemies too,
But my willpower is sturdy
As I'm all for the Blue.


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