Saumya Dwivedi

September 5, 1998- India

Papa (Father)

Its sad to say since it has been 2 years almost,
Yet I feel you will be back home someday,
I don't know how to feel anything,
I am numb once more.

I have been devastated,
I have been anxious,
I have been depressed,
Lost all hope.

It was you who taught me the life lessons,
Some I learned on my own.
The hardiships are the worst enemy,
Moreover are those happy days.

For I feel an empty space,
Since you are gone Papa.
I don't know what to feel and how to feel,
Its all a disaster.

I wish I had one more day,
To see your face,
To hug you for the last time.
For the last time.

Things are rough, I know.
Things are out of control,
Because you were my strenght,
Which has now gone.

My emotions are like a tornado,
A tornado that won't stop,
For I don't really know,
As I am cold inside now.

I am a cold person which I feared to be,
The warmth has all gone,
Since it has been 2 years,
Now that you have gone.

I wished to hold your hand once more,
Once more for I felt at ease.
The comfort has now all gone,
Since it has been 2 years,
Now that you have gone.

I am not a cheerful girl anymore,
For I have so much going on,
Inside feels like a fire burning,
A fire that hasn't stoped.

It has engulfed me with its full force,
The force which was never there.
The innocent girl I once was,
Has now gone to unsearchable place.

I am full of anger and tears,
Which confuse me all the time.
"Am I angry or just sad?" I ask my self,
Its all just a mess.

I hope you were still there,
To comfort me with your angelic smile.
The smile which kept me at ease,
It made me forget all my problems and made me at peace.

I hope God is treating you well,
For you were a wonderful man.
If not then I will be sad,
Very sad to know.

As the world now a days I tell you papa,
Is a very bad place.
Its good that you are not here anymore,
Or it would have taken advantage of you,
For good people don't exist no more.

Its a dark place full of body shamming,
Corruption and theft,
The people are not what they seem,
Breaking hearts is in trend.

All this is true I swear,
As I have faced it all alone,
With a tornado in my heart,
And a big smile on my face.
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