Shay Grace

Fuck Cancer

It's a cold dark day in February, the year 2021
The last year was chaotic and definitely a tough one
It has been full of the deepest darkest lows
knocked down with the toughest blows

Ending the year with a bang your images were colorful
I was naive to think that you were untouchable
I never saw this final round of cancer coming
You’ve been clean for years, this was just so sudden

This story has no happy ending, cancer has finally beat you
This loss has left me paralyzed, and left me feeling blue
My raindrops fall so heavily, leaving me on the floor
Reminding me of my favorite person, my greatest mentor

You were there when my parents went to extremes
You helped me achieve my biggest, wildest dreams
You held my hand when times were rocky and I was upset
You told me great stories, ones I could never forget

I remember the very first time meeting you
I was crying, scared to speak, and from people I withdrew
You tightly grasped my small hand and got me through
You showed me respect like no man I’ve ever looked up to

Through the years you've made me a better person
You made this world a better and brighter version
You brought smiles to faces, left wisdom at the door
You gave me honest advice, my best mentor

You were the only one to ever believe in me
You lifted others higher than the highest tree
Even towards the end, you were there for me
Every Sunday you would sit and drink your tea

I watched as cancer slowly took you captive on its ship
I watch as you slowly slipped out of my constricting grip
Each drop of poison drained your life and future
But you never gave up and always had humor

It was so hard to watch you in pain and suffer
You so rapidly grew pale, weak, and thinner
There was nothing to do but sit there in terror
You had convinced me you were getting better

Then one-day cancer decided to snatch you away
Take you up to a high place so I can meet you one day
I actually don’t believe in that but you sure did
I hope you were proud of everything you did

But Covid, you can go to bloody hell and burn
He wasn't supposed to go this way, it wasn’t his turn
You took the last remaining weeks and our final chat
And so he died alone and scared, and you did that

I was supposed to be with him on his deathbed
Telling stories, telling jokes, feeding him bread
I was supposed to be the ear to listen to all his fears
So he would not be alone and I could dry his tears

I want to soak up every last minute even on the worst day
Every second is so precious, but you took that away
I never even got to say my last goodbye,
Or say I love you not one last time

Even in my worst times, you were the very best
Now that you're gone, I've got no one left
I know you'd tell me to be strong and resilient
But you know how hard it is when I am distant

I just want you back with me, just for a while
I want one more good laugh and to see you smile
Why did you have to go and leave me behind
You should not have suffered, you were too kind

No matter how much I eat, smoke, or drink
You are gone no matter how much I think
I can’t even escape during sleep, I’m always awaken
I have nightmares of how you were unfairly taken

Just give one more day, you can't be gone too
I don't know how I'll live without you
You’ve always been my rock, no matter what time
You belong by my side, I just need more time

I can't express how much you mean to me or my gratitude
Your place on this earth won’t be forgotten, Bud, thank you
You will be so greatly missed, I'll try not to fall apart
You'll always and forever be in my broken heart
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