Randy Johnson

August 20, 1971 - Tennessee
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He Raped My Mule

My neighbor raped my mule last night.
I decided that it was time for us to fight.
He talked tough but I wasn't going to take his sass.
I broke my twelve inch foot off in that pervert's ass.
When I kicked his ass today, I kicked it hard.
He didn't waste any time getting out of my yard.
My poor mule will be scarred for life.
I made a phone call to that pervert's wife.
She told me that she intends to get a divorce.
I locked my barn because I also own a horse.
If you own a mule, you should listen to what I tell you.
Hide it and hide it well because you know what he'll do.

(THIS IS A FICTIONAL POEM.)
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