Jeffrey Pipes Guice

New Orleans
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My Grandma

Grandma finally left
the house today...
We were all very concerned
needless to say...

She had stayed in her room
for many years...
Ever since Elvis died
she had shed many tears...

She was a teenager
who experienced many a drug...
Came into her own
during the Summer of Love...

She had burned her bra
when she felt too confined...
Partied at Studio 54
where she danced The Grind...

She bedded many a man
before delivering my mother...
Never cared for the dad
but said he was a good lover...

She took care of my mom
the best she could...
Gave up LSD while nursing
as a good mom should...

She read Ginsberg and Marx...
Talked often of Timothy Leary...
But listening constantly to Patty Smith and Yoko...
I would often grow somewhat weary...

I bought her a new iPhone
to help her broaden her scope...
But she got hooked on porn
And became a misanthrope...

For the last ten years
She stayed locked in her room...
Ordering Chinese food deliveries
And attending SLAA meetings on Zoom...

Amazon delivered her packages
almost on a daily basis...
She loved virtual dating on Bumble
Receiving gifts from men without faces...

Then finally one day
She came out and said…
“I need a manly man
with a large water bed!”

She ran out the house
All dressed in black...
She was lookin for trouble
With some dude named Jack...

One day they found her iPhone
In a trash bin on Avenue B...
Filled with hundreds of nudie pics
That none of us really wanted to see...

But it was the very last shot
Where as a family we lost all hope...
Grandma was holding a black leather whip...
Spanking a man suspended from the end of a rope...

She was staring into her camera
Wearing nothing more than a wicked grin...
I immediately dropped the iPhone…
Never wanting to see that grin again...

The last news we heard about her
She was hooking in the meat packing district...
We haven’t seen grandma in months...
Maybe she’s just another statistic...

© 2021 Jeffrey Pipes Guice
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